Prompt: Gagged

Summary: At what point does danger become a mere annoyance?  Takes place during “The Pieces of Fate Affair.”

Cross-posted to AO3

Illya had to admit, after getting captured so many times,
getting bound and gagged was starting to get more annoying than anything
else.  Judging by the look on Napoleon’s
face, he was more annoyed and upset about his suit getting covered with dust;
at least, he didn’t wince until he took a look at the dust on his sleeve.

Illya rolled his eyes in spite of himself as Napoleon now
managed to manipulate the gag off of his mouth.
After drawing in a greedy breath of air, he now moved over to Illya,
using his bound hands to work on Illya’s bonds, muttering under his breath
about the laundry bill they would incur.

He showed Illya how to manipulate the gag off; he, too,
began to remark wryly about their situation as Napoleon fretted about more coal
coming down on top of them—at least until Illya pointed out that the building
used oil as heat, as evidenced by the audible sounds of the oil furnace.

“…I am slightly embarrassed that I didn’t notice that,”
Napoleon said, after a moment.  “Huh…”

Illya cleared his throat, holding up his bound hands,
pulling Napoleon from his thoughts once again.

Napoleon managed to untie the bonds—a favor which Illya
quickly returned, and the two of them got to their feet.  Napoleon did a proper surveillance of his
suit, and groaned in dismay as how dirty it was now.

“Look on the bright side, Napoleon,” Illya said.  “At least it is just the laundry, and not a
full destruction of your suit, as what usually tends to happen when we get
captured by THRUSH.”

Napoleon paused for a moment, considering this, and then
gave a “You’ve got a point there,” nod.

“How’s the rest of me?” he wondered, touching his face to
see if he could feel any dirt there.

“Personally, I think the ‘dusty hero’ look augments your
features,” Illya intoned.  “But if your
vanity is that much of a concern, I suppose we could hit the Turkish bath.  Again.”

“…Let’s go with that, then.”

Illya shook his head in amusement, wondering at exactly
what point in their careers a situation like this became more of an annoyance
than an actual danger.